Quillcumkabvab is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, idiotic mongoose.

Quillcumkabvab created the Virgo Supercluster seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Quillcumkabvab, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Quillcumkabvab, he will ignore you.

Quillcumkabvab's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Quillcumkabvab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Quillcumkabvab's name in vain.

2. Never look at dwarf planets.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Never skip in the presence of bats.