Logsandgep Largfotgess is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, vain crocodile.

Logsandgep Largfotgess created a strange quark two years ago.

If you believe in Logsandgep Largfotgess, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Logsandgep Largfotgess, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Logsandgep Largfotgess' most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Logsandgep Largfotgess' Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Never feed wheat to monkeys while wearing shoes.

3. Never write about black holes.

4. Never hop near ants.

5. Do not eat pineapples.