Flaggumkap Quaftapfig is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, kind centipede.

Flaggumkap Quaftapfig created water two million years ago.

If you believe in Flaggumkap Quaftapfig, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Flaggumkap Quaftapfig, she will destroy your home planet.

Flaggumkap Quaftapfig's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Flaggumkap Quaftapfig's Holy Commandments

1. Never run in the presence of foxes.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Do not keep nine snails in a large pit.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never play with disobedient children.
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