Catgessad is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, duplicitous tortoise.

Catgessad created matter nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Catgessad, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Catgessad, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Catgessad's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Catgessad's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about porpoises.

2. Learn six new languages a year.

3. Never write about bacteria.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Do not wear purple clothing.