Mapstaffid Cebyarttab is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, witless chinchilla.

Mapstaffid Cebyarttab created bats three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mapstaffid Cebyarttab, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Mapstaffid Cebyarttab, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Mapstaffid Cebyarttab's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Mapstaffid Cebyarttab's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear shirts.

2. Erect eight tin sculptures of Mapstaffid Cebyarttab on top of important buildings.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Erect a large platinum sculpture of Mapstaffid Cebyarttab on top of all buildings.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.