Bettinhigwap is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, charitable cow.

Bettinhigwap created gold seven million years ago.

If you believe in Bettinhigwap, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Bettinhigwap, she will be very sad.

Bettinhigwap's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Bettinhigwap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Do not keep eight foxes in a large pit.

3. Do not leap in public.

4. Hide from mauve moths for they are unholy.

5. Do not stand on grass.