Cabkonzig is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, temperamental gnu.

Cabkonzig created an electron four years ago.

If you believe in Cabkonzig, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Cabkonzig, he will manifest in front of you.

Cabkonzig's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Cabkonzig's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured ducks.

2. Always help sick sheep.

3. Erect five titanium sculptures of Cabkonzig on top of important buildings.

4. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

5. Do not hurt dolphins.