Larpratcatsand is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, clever squirrel.

Larpratcatsand created the Small Magellanic Cloud six million years ago.

If you believe in Larpratcatsand, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Larpratcatsand, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Larpratcatsand's most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Larpratcatsand's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat lentils.

2. Never paint your back gray.

3. Run away from orange porpoises, for they are unholy.

4. Erect a giant nickel sculpture of Larpratcatsand in the centre of the settlement.

5. Never think about thermodynamics.