Fossweggid is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, emotional newt.

Fossweggid created the Andromeda Galaxy four million years ago.

If you believe in Fossweggid, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Fossweggid, he will turn you into a blue tit.

Fossweggid's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Fossweggid's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of melons to gulls while wearing indigo tights.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Hide if nine squirrels approach from the east.

5. Erect a giant blue sculpture of Fossweggid in the centre of the settlement.