Bumcutgid is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, grumpy manatee.

Bumcutgid created the cosmos six million years ago.

If you believe in Bumcutgid, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Bumcutgid, she will be very sad.

Bumcutgid's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Bumcutgid's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no snails in a room before entering it.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Never think about thermodynamics near nematodes while wearing turquoise skirts and balancing seven carbon spheres on your chest.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.