Jenlakzenfut is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, almighty snake.

Jenlakzenfut created a quark six million years ago.

If you believe in Jenlakzenfut, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Jenlakzenfut, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Jenlakzenfut's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Jenlakzenfut's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

4. Do not speak about onions.

5. Do not wear black clothing.