Cemxuckteen Mipmad is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, tranquil dolphin.

Cemxuckteen Mipmad created a quark seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cemxuckteen Mipmad, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Cemxuckteen Mipmad, it will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Cemxuckteen Mipmad's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Cemxuckteen Mipmad's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Never wear corsets.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Do not wear tin on your body.

5. Never talk about tapirs.