Targkopvilhotarparpnul is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, idiotic jaguar.

Targkopvilhotarparpnul created gold nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Targkopvilhotarparpnul, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Targkopvilhotarparpnul, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Targkopvilhotarparpnul's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Targkopvilhotarparpnul's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at stars.

2. Never skip in the presence of ducks.

3. Hide from cyan birds for they are unholy.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Always look after injured hamsters.