Yobflabvid is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, selfish troll.

Yobflabvid created the solar system eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Yobflabvid, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Yobflabvid, she will turn you into a rock.

Yobflabvid's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Yobflabvid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your face.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Yobflabvid.

4. Never think about amino acids.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.