Flowquartsab is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, caring hare.

Flowquartsab created the universe two million years ago.

If you believe in Flowquartsab, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Flowquartsab, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Flowquartsab's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Flowquartsab's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Flowquartsab five times a day.

2. Snakes are not to be trusted.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Flowquartsab loves pigs, so they must be respected.