Kaphenbug is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, proud deer.

Kaphenbug created the Milkyway two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kaphenbug, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Kaphenbug, it will not care at all.

Kaphenbug's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Kaphenbug's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat oranges.

2. Kaphenbug must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Never eat spinach.

5. You must never eat gooseberries.