Cudmillap is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, all-powerful mink.

Cudmillap created a bottom quark five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cudmillap, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Cudmillap, she will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Cudmillap's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Cudmillap's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed melons to swans while wearing purple kilts.

2. Learn three new languages a year.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Never feed peas to whales while wearing coats.

5. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.