Rillwanhap is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, sage snail.

Rillwanhap created a photon two billion years ago.

If you believe in Rillwanhap, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Rillwanhap, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Rillwanhap's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Rillwanhap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair white.

2. Never feed lots of rice to great tits while wearing magenta trousers.

3. Always help sick gulls.

4. Do not shave your feet.

5. Fast once a month.