Hakzunsitfed is a god.

He takes the form of a small, blissful dryad.

Hakzunsitfed created the planet Mars six billion years ago.

If you believe in Hakzunsitfed, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Hakzunsitfed, he will turn you into a rat.

Hakzunsitfed's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Hakzunsitfed's Holy Commandments

1. Hakzunsitfed loves mice, so they must be honoured.

2. Never write about black holes.

3. Do not shave your chest.

4. Never wear fawn shorts.

5. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.