Gubsantetti is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, narcissistic guinea pig.

Gubsantetti created the Small Magellanic Cloud two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gubsantetti, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Gubsantetti, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Gubsantetti's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Gubsantetti's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep six rats in a large pit.

2. Never go into green rooms.

3. Always look after injured capybaras.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.