Tonlipbun Nelvolshav is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, kind lobster.

Tonlipbun Nelvolshav created carbon three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tonlipbun Nelvolshav, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Tonlipbun Nelvolshav, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Tonlipbun Nelvolshav's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Tonlipbun Nelvolshav's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry ants.

2. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Put Tonlipbun Nelvolshav first in all things.

4. Do not drink water in fawn rooms.

5. Never wear gray hats.