Butbogtof Gedgepben is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, egotistical tapir.

Butbogtof Gedgepben created Asia nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Butbogtof Gedgepben, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Butbogtof Gedgepben, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Butbogtof Gedgepben's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Butbogtof Gedgepben's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Butbogtof Gedgepben.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Never eat grapes.