Wabbagmot is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, annoying whale.

Wabbagmot created everything that exists six billion years ago.

If you believe in Wabbagmot, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Wabbagmot, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Wabbagmot's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Wabbagmot's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no cats in a building before entering it.

2. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never think ill of sick porpoises.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Always pray immersed in water.