Hasbenkom is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, two-faced dugong.

Hasbenkom created the planet Earth nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Hasbenkom, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Hasbenkom, it will be mildly annoyed.

Hasbenkom's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Hasbenkom's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear gray.

2. You must love Hasbenkom.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Do not jump in public.

5. Hide from brown aardvarks for they are unholy.