Shavtadlop is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, sapient fish.

Shavtadlop created a charm quark five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Shavtadlop, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Shavtadlop, it will turn you into a hamster.

Shavtadlop's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Shavtadlop's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into blue rooms.

2. Never talk about eukaryotes.

3. Never hurt tortoises.

4. You must pray to Shavtadlop five times a day.

5. Never write about quantum gravity.