Catwegtarp Tenvidzan is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, calm goat.

Catwegtarp Tenvidzan created parasitic wasps nine million years ago.

If you believe in Catwegtarp Tenvidzan, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Catwegtarp Tenvidzan, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Catwegtarp Tenvidzan's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Catwegtarp Tenvidzan's Holy Commandments

1. Snakes are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Catwegtarp Tenvidzan must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.