Kopcenhub is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, impressive dog.

Kopcenhub created a Higgs boson nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Kopcenhub, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Kopcenhub, she will throw large rocks at you.

Kopcenhub's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Kopcenhub's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place in magenta.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Erect a giant black sculpture of Kopcenhub in the centre of the settlement.

4. Always help sick horses.

5. Hide if seven grasshopers approach from the west.