Stafbonkgupceddadyok is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, narcissistic goose.

Stafbonkgupceddadyok created the cosmos seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Stafbonkgupceddadyok, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Stafbonkgupceddadyok, he will turn you into a slug.

Stafbonkgupceddadyok's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Stafbonkgupceddadyok's Holy Commandments

1. Rats are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Never think about cell theory.

3. Never think ill of sick monkeys.

4. Stafbonkgupceddadyok must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Always make sure there are no otters in a building before entering it.