Pon is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, smart faun.

Pon created a strange quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pon, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Pon, he will destroy your home planet.

Pon's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Pon's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat parsnips.

2. Do not wear gold on your body.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Never think about nucleic acids.