Bepzigvedfig Hom is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, unthoughtful slug.

Bepzigvedfig Hom created an atom four million years ago.

If you believe in Bepzigvedfig Hom, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Bepzigvedfig Hom, she will turn you into a mouse.

Bepzigvedfig Hom's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Bepzigvedfig Hom's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about fluid mechanics.

2. Retreat if six tortoises approach from the south.

3. Run away if nine birds approach from the west.

4. Do not hurt monkeys.

5. Run away from mauve ducks, for they are unholy.