Arfyarpnan is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, wise mole.

Arfyarpnan created matter six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Arfyarpnan, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Arfyarpnan, it will turn you into a sparrow.

Arfyarpnan's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Arfyarpnan's Holy Commandments

1. Great tits are not to be trusted.

2. Never paint your neck purple.

3. You must never eat aubergines.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate hamsters.

5. Never look at planets.