Cidrigfobmap is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, duplicitous cow.

Cidrigfobmap created parasitic wasps four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cidrigfobmap, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Cidrigfobmap, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Cidrigfobmap's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Cidrigfobmap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear carbon on your body.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Cidrigfobmap.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Never think about dark matter near porpoises while wearing indigo tights and balancing eight silicon spheres on your legs.

5. Erect a giant titanium sculpture of Cidrigfobmap in the centre of the settlement.