Ziggudpib is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, caring shark.

Ziggudpib created energy seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ziggudpib, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Ziggudpib, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Ziggudpib's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Ziggudpib's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear mauve corsets.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Never go into violet rooms.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate dogs.

5. Never talk about thermodynamics near moths while wearing blue scarves and balancing eight zinc spheres on your feet.