Yamdambud is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, sage manatee.

Yamdambud created the Small Magellanic Cloud nine million years ago.

If you believe in Yamdambud, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Yamdambud, he will turn you into a worm.

Yamdambud's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Yamdambud's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Never skip near monkeys.