Flagbotzig is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, all-powerful gerbil.

Flagbotzig created a top quark five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flagbotzig, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Flagbotzig, she will think nothing of it.

Flagbotzig's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Flagbotzig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Never bounce near nematodes.

3. You must pray to Flagbotzig four times a day.

4. Never talk about grasshopers.

5. Do not shave your head.