Vagveenlid is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, bad-tempered toad.

Vagveenlid created humanity eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vagveenlid, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Vagveenlid, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Vagveenlid's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Vagveenlid's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Never sing near geese.

3. Run away from black moths, for they are unholy.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Erect a large platinum sculpture of Vagveenlid on top of all buildings.