Pibwapquaf is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, unthoughtful bear.

Pibwapquaf created energy six million years ago.

If you believe in Pibwapquaf, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Pibwapquaf, he will turn you into a goat.

Pibwapquaf's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Pibwapquaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about moons.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Erect a giant silver sculpture of Pibwapquaf in the centre of the settlement.