Bonkmetsid is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, awesome guinea pig.

Bonkmetsid created the Large Magellanic Cloud four years ago.

If you believe in Bonkmetsid, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Bonkmetsid, she will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Bonkmetsid's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Bonkmetsid's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Never hurt mice.

3. Never look at black holes.

4. Learn seven new languages a year.

5. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.