Sasjappib is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, staggering raven.

Sasjappib created dark energy two billion years ago.

If you believe in Sasjappib, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Sasjappib, she will send you a sign.

Sasjappib's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Sasjappib's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Do not wear white clothing.

4. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.