Ladlun is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, passionate narwhal.

Ladlun created the planet Saturn three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Ladlun, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Ladlun, he will turn you into a rock.

Ladlun's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Ladlun's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

3. Do not speak about strawberries.

4. Always wear black.

5. Ladlun loves pigs, so they must be respected.