Rapbabwat is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, moody aardvark.

Rapbabwat created the Sun seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Rapbabwat, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Rapbabwat, it will turn you into a snail.

Rapbabwat's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Rapbabwat's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of garlic to turtles while wearing green coats.

2. Do not wear turquoise clothing.

3. Learn eight new languages a year.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Rapbabwat loves great tits, so they must be honoured.