Yattmotmidyarlxinwikbut is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, intelligent wombat.

Yattmotmidyarlxinwikbut created the Small Magellanic Cloud six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yattmotmidyarlxinwikbut, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Yattmotmidyarlxinwikbut, he will turn you into a dog.

Yattmotmidyarlxinwikbut's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Yattmotmidyarlxinwikbut's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place in fawn.

2. Yattmotmidyarlxinwikbut must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Never feed bananas to voles while wearing dresses.

4. Never talk about spacetime near foxes while wearing red shorts and balancing three carbon spheres on your hands.

5. Never mention capybaras.