Spagdutceb is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, passionate dugong.

Spagdutceb created humanity eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Spagdutceb, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Spagdutceb, he will have a low opinion of you.

Spagdutceb's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Spagdutceb's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Erect a giant titanium sculpture of Spagdutceb in the centre of the settlement.

3. Always help sick otters.

4. Whales are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Never feed tomatoes to goats while wearing gray rings.