Parkspagkimxempoghomgab is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, generous salamander.

Parkspagkimxempoghomgab created light four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Parkspagkimxempoghomgab, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Parkspagkimxempoghomgab, it will jump up and down on your head.

Parkspagkimxempoghomgab's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Parkspagkimxempoghomgab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat turnips.

2. Parkspagkimxempoghomgab loves snakes, so they must be respected.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of nickel.

4. Do not shave your arms.

5. Put Parkspagkimxempoghomgab first in all things.