Sitontgep is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, omniscient parrot.

Sitontgep created a strange quark seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sitontgep, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Sitontgep, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Sitontgep's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Sitontgep's Holy Commandments

1. Put Sitontgep first in all things.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Never write about ribonucleic acid.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Monkeys are not to be trusted.