Capsatnur is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, passionate spider.

Capsatnur created a bottom quark three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Capsatnur, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Capsatnur, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Capsatnur's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Capsatnur's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about optics near swans while wearing red ear rings and balancing five tin spheres on your legs.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Capsatnur.

3. You must pray to Capsatnur seven times a day.

4. Run away if three cats approach from the south.

5. Do not chop down trees.