Rigdisshav is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, awe-inspiring scorpion.

Rigdisshav created carbon three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rigdisshav, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Rigdisshav, it will cry a lot.

Rigdisshav's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Rigdisshav's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Never talk about optics near squirrels while wearing indigo ear rings and balancing five silicon spheres on your feet.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Do not stand on grass.