Cargofbepsak is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, amazing raven.

Cargofbepsak created a top quark three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cargofbepsak, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Cargofbepsak, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Cargofbepsak's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Cargofbepsak's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant yellow sculpture of Cargofbepsak in the centre of the settlement.

2. Never hurt foxes.

3. Do not drink water in red rooms.

4. Never think ill of sick bats.

5. Never talk about eukaryotes.