Bamjadyarldutlogman is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, passionate cat.

Bamjadyarldutlogman created humanity five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bamjadyarldutlogman, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Bamjadyarldutlogman, it will try to impress you with trees.

Bamjadyarldutlogman's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Bamjadyarldutlogman's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.