Fedflanbit is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, uncaring hippopotamus.

Fedflanbit created dark matter six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fedflanbit, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Fedflanbit, she will turn you into a sheep.

Fedflanbit's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Fedflanbit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear fawn clothing.

2. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

3. Do not take Fedflanbit's name in vain.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Fedflanbit.